| Quotes: |
| How can a woman be expected to be happy with a man who insists on treating her as if she were a perfectly normal human being. - Oscar Wilde |
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| Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. - Albert Einstein |
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| Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge. - Mark Twain |
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| I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him. - Mark Twain |
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| Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence. - Albert Einstein |
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| Wednesday, April 12, 2006 |
| The Price of Pride |
Once upon a time there was a woman who left a bad marriage. She left with the clothes on her back & little else. Being somewhat poor at this time, she accepted all offers of furniture.
She was grateful for the items that others considered junk, because it was all she had. She learnt to make a home from the debris of her own & others lives. The couch was stained and cat scratched. The cupboard was dented and scratched. A sheet to cover the couch & a coat of paint covered the worst of the asthetic ills.
Over time this woman worked her (not so little) butt off, to create a better life for herself. She was gradually able to 'upgrade' and buy herself some nice furniture. Thinking it would be a good thing to 'pass it forward' she decided to donate the furniture instead of dumping it.
The salvation army & st vincent de paul both rejected her furniture. 'Oh we couldn't give that to someone' 'Doesn't matter if you don't have much, you still have the right to pride'
Well this woman begged to differ and so do I.
People become poverty struck for various reasons, some through circumstance, some through the choices they make.
But something has to be better than nothing. If I have the choice between the cold ground and a crappy couch - I'll take the crappy couch. Maybe it will give me the incentive to pull my socks up and get something better.
If I have nothing, then the only way is up. I can be proud of my efforts to get myself out of my quagmire - but why should I be proud of belongings given not earnt? As if I had a right to the best?
I believe the culture we have, where people just expect to be given is WRONG. What happened to elbow grease, work ethics and 'old fashioned' get up and go?
I think the words 'delayed gratification' have disappeared as concepts from the collective consciousness of society & it peeves me greatly.
I work hard and put up with daily frustrations to make my kids work for what they want. It may not be the easiest road, but I'll be damned before I'll let them learn that they can just expect and get. I like them too much to set them up for the depths of failure that reality will provide for them as they get older.
I wish others would do the same. |
posted by Blue @ 7:55 pm  |
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| 7 Comments: |
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well said, very well said indeed
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There is something about making mistakes. It helps build character. Parents need to let their children explore and err. Sometimes through that exploration the and the parents learn a new way of interacting with the world around them.
It would help if we could learn to be heros to our kids. These are just some of my musings on the subject. No pressure to check out the link.
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Sort of like Rebecca DeMornay's refusal to take Elaine's muffin stumps & George's toilet book roflmao :)
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I'm with you. I'm all in favor of helping those who are down, but I believe in helping them to help themselves, not in bankrolling them for eternity.
I once tried to donate my old (very old, but still working) window A/C unit to the Salvation Army. I left it outside for them to pickup. The guy dropped by and left me a note saying it wasn't in good enough shape for them. Personally, I think he just didn't want to have to lift the old cast iron monster.
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"well said, very well said indeed"...
...ditto lime.
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My sister replaced her couch last year and could find no charitable organization to take her old one - which was a fine piece of furniture - well-built and in good shape - not frayed or torn, but certainly faded and dated. she eventually paid to have it hauled to the dump (she was willing to pay to have it hauled to a charity, but no one would take it).
but sometimes,nothing is better than something. if you can't fix it up (like you mention Blue, throwing a covering over a worn couch - that works), if you can't make it work - it's junk, plain and simple and then nothing is better.
i've helped accept donations for charitable organziations in the past. one time, this woman tried to donate a chair that reeked of cat piss. her cat had peed (i think repeatedly, juding by the smell) on the chair cushion, which was not removable. the woman explained she had had the chair cleaned repeatedly - to no avail - she just could not get the smell out. so she's donating it? she actually said "it's good enough for some poor person." i think not. in that case, nothing is better than something.
you wouldn't believe how much useless, inoperable, unrepairable stuff people try to donate - essentially using the charity as their garbage dump.
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Bird,
I take your point about junk dumping, but to make a determination that nothing is better than something that is functional & clean is beyond me. My current view (somewhat biased at present) is that there is a whole bunch of kids/people coming through our society with a view that they are 'owed' something. That they shouldn't have to 'do' or 'work' to achieve - that they have a right to 'stuff'. That is what I have a problem with!!!! While not everyone is born equal in society (financially etc) everyone with a modicum of intelligence & get up & go can make a success (which means different things to different people) of their lives.
If you are not making mistakes then you are not learning.... On the other hand if you continue to repeat the same mistakes then you are stupid.
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well said, very well said indeed